Hollywood Ambition

Hollywood is a rotten, dirty little city full of transvestite prostitutes and derelict crackheads, all-around drunkards and addicts as well as a few high-profile clubs and various see-and-be-seen hotspots. Hollywood is also a city of dreams, a metonym to the industry that has come to define entertainment everywhere west of India. And like all dreams, few people who aspire to them ever actually achieve them.

No, Hollywood in actuality should be known worldwide as a place where people go to fail. If you took the droves of ambitious young men who move here to be the next Brad Pitt or Francis Ford Coppola or Quentin Tarantino and subtracted from the multitudes the select few who actually make a legitimate living in their chosen profession of expression, you would be able to fill various small African countries or at least the whole state of Texas with talented, good-looking failures.

Yet every year thousands of starstruck young hopefuls get off the bus on Hollywood and Vine (or, more likely, get off the plane at LAX like that Miley Cyrus song) with a belief that “Yes, gosh darn it, I’m gonna make it!”

But what is “making it”? The average hourly wage for a member of SAG, arguably the hardest union to join in the country, is less than $20. And that’s without a guarantee for work, no base annual salary, nothing. Still, they can say they’re actors – is that making it?

Directors and writers fare a little better, the average DGA-member coming closer to $70,000 a year. But in a city where a home costs nearly 10 times that, good luck enjoying life. More than likely you’ll be sharing a condo in “the valley”, an impression in the ground dressed up as a city hewn out of a barren desert, like living inside a hollow, concrete patch of chaparral.  

So what’s the goal? Achieve the unattainable? And if you’re the one in a million who actually becomes a money-making creative-commerce king, you have one more hurdle – do you sell out, create hideous commercial fodder for millions of dollars or push towards the insightful, “poignant” indie flick that wins you credibility in their community and maybe, just maybe, wins you an Oscar? Because not only does that determine what kind of man the world perceives you as (think Jason Statham vs. Johnny Depp vs. Brad Pitt vs. Nicholas Cage) but it also determines how long of a career you’ll have in the most fickle of industries.

So we’ll be following upcoming movies that men strive to be a part of. And right now, being Oscar season, we’ll be specializing in the indies, the eccentrics, and other movies that you might not be looking to see. We’lll go over what to watch, what’s looking promising, and who you should keep an eye out for.  And occasionally drop some knowledge on some everyday working Hollywoodites you’ve probably never heard of but who, for all intents and purposes, have made it.

Res Ipsa Loquitor,

Ryan

Man's Ambition: NFL, 2k11

If I have learned anything over my years on this earth, it is that life is a giant mental fuck. Feelings of acceptance are often followed by feelings of self-consciousness; with achievement comes an almost unhealthy amount of responsibilities, and with joy comes an unrealistic goal of maintaining the emotion. Similarly, sports starts follow the same trend. No one knows a bench warmer until he starts showing a relentless drive that leads to wins, championships, and accolades. After finally reaching the level that he knew he could achieve, he is thrust into the spotlight where the media turns his life into a living documentary. Knowing that each movement might lead to a minor mistake that gets magnified beyond considerable recognition creates a self induced stigma that each minor blemish is unforgivable. When an individual or a team wins, they must utilize their publicity for the greater good of the world. As a humanitarian, I believe that we must continue to shed light on monstrosities that exist, but why is it that “wins” equal “perfect role models”? 

Michael Phelps was caught smoking weed. Besides some of these crazy Southern right wingers who know nothing of the world besides God and goats, everyone has tried it at least once. Shit, it’s decriminalized in certain states and will continue to be pushed forward until it is eventually legalized. 

The most exalted and at the same time foolish aspect of life is the setting of unhealthy expectations for winners competing at the top level. The Yankees have a few years without a World Series, boom, coach is released. The Cowboys have a year that deviates from their standard level of excellence, boom, coach is released. The most recent situation involves the US soccer coach Bob Bradley. Is it the coach or the youth training programs that are the issue with US soccer? Last year, the US men’s soccer team had a top moment when Landon scored in extra time. By no means do I think that they should have been celebrated as being successful, since they did not even place at the world cup (Isn’t that the goal?), but they were given praise and yet the coach was fired. Either way, when you win, that joy can be short lived to such an extent that heads roll after a minor hiccup.

Why am I discussing this? Because the NFL season is finally upon us after dealing with a tumultuous lockout and the 3 off-field aspects of sports that I mentioned above are dominating the US’ golden egg. This is going to be my first segment of many; each week I’ll provide insight into each game.

Each sport has had its moment in the sun and the NFL at this point has completely taken over.  I will follow this post up with a breakdown of each team and potential outlooks complemented by an on-field fantasy NFL league followed by reports on the off-field, illegal and classless behavior of today’s top players in the NFL and beyond. Each week will include predictions of the potential winners, scaled by how much money I believe should be put down per my theory. I am not always going to be right, but goddammit, I will make it enjoyable.

I'll keep you posted. 

Here’s to Man’s Ambition to be the last football player standing when that whistle blows in January.

 -Kyle