Lock-Street, Week 2 - 9.16

It’s week two and still nothing in the NFL is definite. You can’t really get a solid glimpse of a team until at least week 6. Last week, we entered into the Luck and RG III era. We saw the Packers, Saints, Steelers, and Giants all lose. The Jets finally put up some points, and both Baltimore and Chicago appeared to have an offensive swag, while the Eagles appear to be stuck in another beginning of the year rut. Keep watching, keep listening, and keep drinking because there's nothing that goes with football better than alcohol. Well, sex is cool too.

1pm Baltimore (+2.5) vs. Philadelphia Eagles

I’ll start off by stating that the Eagles are not the imploding gaggle of underachieving individuals that squeaked out a win against a hapless Cleveland team. It was apparent that Vick (4 picks, 29 for 56, 317 yards, and 2 TDs=Rating of 51) was engulfed by a desire to torture every player on the Browns instead of play football. He is a natural born killer - of dogs that is - and thus will simply have mental issues against a team whose mascot is a canine. Karma's a bitch. Vick did prove two years ago that he can sling the rock (I’m not talking about crack), but he's still not accurate and teams have learned how to adapt to mobile QB’s since Vick’s inception in the league. You put several men on the line and keep him in a bubble so he has nowhere to go. He's as deadly running the ball as he is throwing on the move. This also does not bid well for LeSean ‘Shady’ McCoy. Their two best receivers are nursing injuries (D. Jacks and Maclain). On paper, the Eagles look to be a formable foe but they have some issues that need to addressed. Does anyone else remember a time when they started off slow? On the other side, the Baltimore Ravens are primed for excellence this year. Although the Ravens pass rush is not what it was last year, Vick is one hit from needing a wheelchair since their o-line is grade A garbage. The Ravens also seem to have a strong understanding of their offensive game plan, with one of the most underrated offenses in the game. Flacco, Rice, Leach, Bolden, T. Smith, Jones, Dickson, and Pitta have all proven they can change a game. The Eagles defense is overall weak. Yea, that’s right, I said it. They have great corners in Nnamdi and Rodgers-Cromartie, two great rushers in Babin and Cole, but lack decent LB’s besides DeMeco Ryan. Watch as Flacco (299 yards, 2 TD’s, 21 for 29) and the Ravens not only cover, but they win by a TD even at the Linc. (31-24 Ravens Win)

4:25pm Jets vs. Steelers (u41.5)

Last week’s Jets offensive show was an anomaly. They were playing against an over-hyped Bills defense and their field position at the start of each offensive series was a rarity caused by the inadequacy of Ryan Fitzpatrick (3 picks). After he received that overpriced contract extension, he has appeared to be the Ryan of old. Being a Harvard alum, you would think he would be smart enough to not throw in double-coverage. Now, Sanchez looked to be a polished sharpshooter destined to overcome the flack he has received since his rookie season (19 for 27, 266 yards, 3 TD’s). That said, old Marky Mark, Holmes, and Shonn ‘I’m overrated every year' Greene need to be afraid of an angry Steelers’ defense. They'll be hunting for blood after suffering a rough lost to the Broncos. The Steelers once again have a useless offensive line, Mendenhall and Redman are still not 100%, and it’s going to take Mike Wallace a few weeks to get into the NFL zone after holding out most of preseason. The new Human Plague is not going to be much of a factor if Big Ben gets raped all over the field and cannot sling him the ball. Big Ben will finally know the emotionally toll that ensues after being taken advantage of by big men. Watch for a hard fought, slightly sloppy, low scoring affair. (17-14 Steelers win)

8:25pm-Sunday Detroit Lions vs. San Francisco 49’s (O 46.5)

In all honesty, I would not touch this game with someone else’s dick, but seeing how I need to evaluate at least 1 game at each time frame, I decided that the Over would be the most realistic to hit. The 49’s offense looked efficient against a Packers Team last week that sacked Cutler 7 times, forced 4 picks, and held the Bears to 168 total yards and 11 first downs. Last week Alex Smith threw for 211 yards, 2 TD’s, and was as efficient as an elite QB. Do I foresee him playing this way all year? No. But with new weapons Randy Moss and Mario ‘Super Bowl Legend’ Manningham playing with regulars like Crabtree and Davis, watch out world. Oh, and I’m not sure if you remember, but they have the Human Anvil Frank Gore running the ball. Last week, he ran for 112 yards and a TD. His back-up, Hunter? A respectable 41 yards. Last Week, The Lions might have lost but Stafford still managed to throw for 355 yards and 1 TD. Calvin ‘Megatron’ Johnson is still a beast even in a loss, with 111 yards; TE Pettigrew had 77 yards receiving, and Nate Burleson can still make plays. Seeing how Kevin Smith will once again have a garbage year, the Lions need to attack by air. The 49’s defense is good, but a top-tier offense can usually beat a top-tier defense. Plus, while Lions have some manimals up front in Suh, Avril, Vanden Bosch, and Tulloch, their secondary consists of nothing but back-ups on most squads. Watch out for a fun, high scoring romp. (28-21 49’s Win)

- Kyle