With exactly 1 month until the Olympics begins - technically the 2012 London Games begin with the opening ceremony on 7/27 but, I dunno, can you really count a bunch of physical specimens walking out waving in stereotypical matching garb while local back-flippers and drum-beaters make a lot of racket beneath the laser lights during the opening ceremony? Actually, considering all these revelations Kyle's shared with us as to what are actual Olympic sports - perhaps...
Regardless, competition starts 7/28 and certainly London's scrambling to make it happen. Their spending's already on pace to be double their budget. London won the Olympics based on an original budget which, to counter China's insurmountable extravaganza, came in around $4 Billion. 2 years later it rocketed to $15 billion and now they think it's gonna double that counting inflation and all. Hey, why not? Not like overspending on the Olympics ever hurt anybody, right?
Anyway, since we're a little past halfway through Kyle's epic analysis of Olympic events you've never heard of, and considering the fact that y'all should be paying attention to the X Games right now anyway, figured we might as well do a recap of where we've been so far before delving into the final 4:
Kyle runs through the Shooting events in which a controlled explosion propelling a lead plug down a long metal tube towards an arbitrary inanimate object is considered a sport.
In AGE OF INNOCENCE high society women had epic archery competitions. Then everybody decided that was gay. Now HUNGER GAMES has made archery cool again. Check out Kyle's rundown to see who to cheer for.
Washington Crossed the Delaware on a canoe of some sort and we subsequently won our independence. Every tribe all over the world used canoes to get around. Then came an invention known as the outboard motor and canoes were reduced to transpo for hippies and the Olympics.
The most attention to ever befall the sport of diving was when everybody wondered if Greg Louganis had given his fellow competitors and trainers AIDS (too soon?). Kyle talks about who to watch in a sport that's just about super cool. Just about.
I thought this was just an excuse to convince blue blood girls to keep thin by running around a field bending over in plaid skirts. Who knew it was a real sport? Kyle did. Or at least he does now with this rundown of the highest level of what I used to call "mobilized golf".
It's like 3 flies meets nukem meets racquetball. I think. Not really sure. How is this still a sport? Here's how (and who's good at it).
So there it is. Next Thursday Kyle will pick back up with his epic series on Olympic Events you know nothing about so by the time the Olympics finally arrive, you'll know a couple names and a few events besides Michael Phelps, track, and gymnastics. Making you a better person all around.
'Cuz that's what we do.
- Ryan
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